Thursday, October 6, 2011

So sad

Every day it seems like there's at least one small moment when I whisper to myself, "I can't wait for the all the sadness in the world to be gone."  "I can't wait for all the broken things of the world to be fixed and made whole."  "I can't wait for complete goodness and rightness."

In recent days, however, those thoughts have become much more than one small whisper-to-myself-moment.  It's the constant thread.  I can't stop thinking about it.  I can't stop longing for the tears to be wiped away.  I can't stop longing for the liberation of enslaved girls.  I can't stop longing for goodness to reign.  For evil to be condemned and punished.  For unfilled dreams to finally be realized and fulfilled.  For the lame to walk and dance and jump.  For the mute to talk and yell and sing.  For the blind to see and behold the greatest glory of all.  For the deaf to hear the most beautiful words ever spoken.  For broken hearts to flow with life again.

Dreams I have dreamed.  They will go empty.  Visions I've had.  They'll never be fulfilled.

Hearts that should work.  And they don't.
Some of my dearest friends in the world, Ben and Shaina, with a 3 month old baby.  With a heart that's not working like it should.  It was created to bring life.  To sustain life.  Her name is Chaia, which is Hebrew for LIFE.  She should have life.

But, in this world, death and poison and unrightness and weeping and "not supposed to be this way's" have tainted and twisted.

Dreams unfulfilled are a letdown.
Hearts don't work like they should.

And it's sad.  I feel sad for the way things are.
I feel sad for the mess and poison my own hands have created in this world.

I am sad.
All I can do is hope.  This world makes me sad.  There's not much hope for a better tomorrow here.  It keeps getting worse.  The days keep getting darker.  And the sadness drives deeper.

I don't hope in today.  I can't find hope in tomorrow.

But faith is saving the world.  Faith in a King.  in a Good King.  in a King who will reign with goodness.  with justice.  and grace.  and sweetness.  in a King who has power.  in a King who loves.

in a King who makes the dead hearts beat again.  who unlocks the shackles on the feet of women in the brothel.  who feeds the greatest feast ever to tent city.  who hugs the fatherless.  who gently lays a hand on the beaten.

I'm longing for the King's return.
But in the meantime, may faith be the hope offered to the world.  Faith is beautifying the world.

Chaia Update from Wadsworth UMC on Vimeo.

Chaia is a warrior.  Her parents are heros.  God is saving the day.